Confessions of an Internet Junkie

Initially I was going to play the Adam game and pass the buck onto Firefox and Google, but then I decided to do the right/honourable thing and come straight on weird addiction.
Yesterday there was a note in BBC Magazine, about how as many as 17 million people actually refuse to go online. To say I was flabbergasted is an understatement. I mean, I had an uncle approaching 80 and he wanted to get on the facebook/twitter bandwagon. After of course buying a new comp, a new printer and all the required software a few years ago, learning to double click, learn to curse windows for everything, the difference between explorer and internet explorer. But slowly and steadily he and his wife started using email and attachments instead of faxing, and started receiving pictures of all their loved ones, without having to wait for some function to receive it as gifts.
OK, what I am getting at is simple. I was under the impression that everyone given the means would possibly be jetting along the internet highway, like a hippie on weed. So the article came as quite a surprise.
For those of you following the German election campaign, you would have noticed that there is a lot of noise about internet surveillance. A short report can be read here! So there we have one group refusing to get onto the internet, and there is one group trying to make the internet safe for anyone older than 3.
So there I started wondering what the hell I use the internet for? Leaving aside the countless hours searching for some obscure paper related to my work, depending on Wikipedia to tell me Newtons first law, reading up how to configure and reconfigure Outlook, referring up all commands related to DOS (except ping of course) and HTML, I guess I also use the internet for news, different news from different sources, checking mail from different accounts, checking all the social networks, reading blogs, reading the comments in the blogs, watching videos, reading the comments to the videos, writing on the internet, like anyone cares what I think about, forgetting to maintain an address book, as everything is in google mail. Ah and then the usual: shopping online, banking online, chatting online, video chatting online and of course flirting online.
So at the end of the day, for someone who has absolutely no reason to be online this long, I am pretty much online. It has been a long way since the days when I did not read the daily paper that was delivered home or the fact that I haven't written a single normal letter to anyone.
OMG! So now do intend to change my ways and stay away from anything that has wires coming out of it! Or anything without wires, like Internet in a Black box! No freaking way, this is a love affair to last. How else am I going to waste time searching for all the useless things that I def do not need to know. Next thing on the list when I have enough money, get an internet phone directly implanted under my skin or if that is still a few years away, then i ll settle for a needle jacked up my spinal cord Neo-style!!! HAHA...